This is my favorite song by The Bruce. - and it is for my husband Allen who dragged me thru the worst week of my life. I guess after 21 years of marriage (and a few years of living in sin) - he took those vows pretty serious....I love you Allen.....I know I could not do this with out you by my side.
We said we'd walk together baby come what may
That come the twilight should we lose our way
If as were walkin a hand should slip free
Ill wait for you
And should I fall behind
Wait for me
We swore wed travel darlin side by side
Wed help each other stay in stride
But each lovers steps fall so differently
But I'll wait for you
And if I should fall behind
Wait for me
Now everyone dreams of a love lasting and true
But you and I know what this world can do
So lets make our steps clear that the other may see
And I'll wait for you
If I should fall behind
Wait for me
Now there's a beautiful river in the valley ahead
There neath the oaks bough soon we will be wed
Should we lose each other in the shadow of the evening trees
Ill wait for you
And should I fall behind
Wait for me
Darlin I'll wait for you
Should I fall behind
Wait for me
It is how I feel right now - behind !
I am behind at work
I am behind at home.
I am behind emothinally, mentally, physically and everywhere else.
This last chemo treatment was very rough. Everything hurt and made me sick. I have to say I felt very sick, more so than I have anytime else in my whole life. I told my husband I just wanted to stop the treatment and just take the oral meds and roll the dice. If the cancer comes back to just let it take me. He won't let me do that...he drags me thru yet another treatment, to yet another doctor apointment and through a very low point in my life. He took care of me. It is hard to do that when some one you love is throwing up non stop and coughing up all kinds of strange looking life forms, changing sheets in the middle of the night, helping some one who has no energy to walk from the bed to the bathroom. I am sure he is wondering what happened to his young wife who was full of energy.
Oh and Thank you for getting some one to clean the house ....you know what makes me happy ! :)
There is nothing like a clean bathroom to make you feel better - trust me on this one.
Thank you for getting up at 3 am and sitting with me and talking me thru the darkness and pulling me upto the next level. I love you.
For richer or poorer
for better or worse
In sickness and health
till beyond death - forever.
We have been through so much in our lives - but
I will never forget this time in our life and what you have done for me.
I guess God knew what he was doing all those years ago when I broke my foot with a u-haul (something only Allen would understand)
So please wait for me - I will be back one day.
I still wish my parents were here....I miss them so much. Not that they would be "taking care" of me - just the mental support, Mental Support is so important to cancer patients - it is what gets us thru the bad days. Just knowing someone else out there cares and is pulling for us.
If you know some one who is sick or struggling....give them a call today.
Reach out. Bring them some soup or send a text or email.
Let them know you are thinking of them.
Ps -
Please do not tell them to be positive or strong, or about your Aunt/sisters/cousin who recovered from this 10 years ago.
We dont want to hear that - because we are struggling to be strong and positive as we can.
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